Filler!

I know, I know: It's been ages since my last post. It's a busy and transitional time for me, and that means my eight readers have to suffer these balmy September weeks without my lengthy yet insightful diatribes. More ruminations and pontifications soon, I promise.

So, to keep you busy, a detailed, unscientific analysis of the percentage of dialogue that audiences find intelligible when articulated by the following soap actors:

Thorsten Kaye (Zach, AMC) - 84%
David Fumero (Cristian, OLTL) - 80%
Maurice Benard (Sonny, GH) - 67%
Steve Burton (Jason, GH) - 66% (May possibly share Benard's mumbling coach)
Elizabeth Hubbard (Lucinda, ATWT) -62% (Strings random words together in a sort of nonsense verse)
Eric Braeden (Victor, Y&R) - 44% (When Victor is shouting at someone: 58%)
Adam Brody (Seth, The O.C.) - 31%
Antonio Sabato Jr. (GH, B&B, Melrose, various pap) - 7%
Rachel Bilson (Summer, The O.C.) - 1%, might possibly be speaking Portuguese

Discuss.